Subject: fun day (Ed wrote this on May 20th) This was supposed to be an "off" week for treatment, doctors, etc., yet I just left the hospital a few hours ago. It started early Tuesday, about 4 A. M., when I began to experience the mother of all bellyaches. I expected it to go away, but it got worse. Around 2 P. M., I was laying in the foetal position, afraid to move lest it produce pain, when the thought occurred to me that it might be advisable to call the doctor. The oncologist, communicating through his nurse, told me to go to the ER. At triage (intake) I mentioned one of my latest chemo drugs was known to poke holes in stomachs, so they started out looking for perforations. The doc who examined me said my findings were consistent with peritonitis (massive infection of the abdomen,) but more tests were needed. I knew it wasn't an infection because my white count was normal and there was no fever. Along the way, I had another CT scan, which showed that my main tumour was the same size as a month ago, but all the little tumours has formed a crust that was spreading. Best, though, was the opinion that the spot in my liver was a cyst. For the case at hand, there appeared to be a partial obstruction of the small intestine, for which the doc dropped an NG (naso-gastric) tube. That's something that goes in your nostril and down into your belly and sometimes beyond. Mine was bright blue, so I looked like a colourful plastic elephant. The tube was attached to a suction machine, so they got 1,300 cc's of bad stuff out. They also zapped me with dilaudid, a semi-synthetic morphine which put me into a deep sleep. The ER doc called my gastroenterologist, who wanted me admitted. I didn't want to, but the ER doc promised more dilaudid, so how could I refuse? I was admitted for observation, which meant they had to kick me out by noon the next day. A few minutes before noon, the gastro man shows up and starts making noises about keeping the NG tube in place (it was supposed to come out that morning) and keeping me in as well. I told him I wasn't going that route, but I agreed to hang around until he consulted with the oncologist. He made noises about having me seen by surgeons as well, which annoyed me greatly. A couple hours later, he was still doing his song and dance, so Dr. St.Germain ordered the head nurse to DC (discontinue) the NG tube and the IV, and bring me an AMA (signing out Against Medical Advice) form to sign. She laughed, but called the gastro man, and next thing I knew, I was outta there. Being nasty has its rewards. Now (Wednesday evening) I'm at home with a big bowl of ice cream. There's a slight drawback to NG tubes, you can't eat with one in place. So for a day and a half I was NPO (latin for nil per os, which some would have you believe means nothing by mouth, but which to doctors means this is more fun than waterboarding.) Well, back to the ice cream.